"trust is like a mirror, you can fix it if it's broken, but you can still see the crack in that mother-fucker's reflection."
you can let the sun in

Six billion of us walking the planet.
Six billion smaller worlds on the bigger one.
Shoe salesmen and short-order cooks who look boring from the outside
- some have weirder lives than you.
Six billion stories, every one an epic,
full of tragedy and triumph,
good and evil,
despair and hope.
You and me - we aren’t so special, bro.

you can say something

you can enrich your mind
Adeline
Alvin
Angeline
Cashew
Dogget
Dionnie
Faith
Ian
Janice
Jas Cheng
Jing
Kitty
Marcus A.C
Natasha
Skye
Spanky
Suzy
Yubo
ZhiQuan

you can read me again and again
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  • you can thank them
    Layout: vehemency
    Icon: reruntherace
    Homeground: blogger

    Monday, August 30, 2010, 8/30/2010 12:10:00 AM

    The first B plus life I noticed was mine. I had a job that I enjoyed, a great marriage, a lovely home and wonderful friends. I had good health and good relationships with family. But I had a subtle, uncomfortable sense that I was not living my right life. I kept having a troubling thought -- that at the end of my life, I'd feel I had been more loyal to fear than to my dreams.

    But on the other hand, I reasoned, things seemed so good. I had so many blessings in my life. What was my problem?

    My problem was the problem of the B+ life.

    In a B+ life, things are good but not great. All the right life elements are in place: good job, good friends, people you love. The checklist items are checked.

    But something feels off. Life feels like it is happening in black and white, rather than in full color. Something in you keeps asking, "Is this all there is?"

    The B+ life is an epidemic.

    What's the alternative? I wouldn't call it an A+ life, because an A+ connotes perfection, as if life is a test to ace. The alternative to a B+ life has nothing to do with perfection -- it's all about risk, trying, messiness and imperfect action.

    It's the life that you know you will conclude with a sense of, "Yes, I was really here. I really did it. I lived, I experienced, I created, I had impact."

    It's a life that is regularly move-you-to-tears poignant, that feels graced with joy.

    It about swinging for the fences and being the real you and risking and doing it all fully.

    If you are living in the grays of B plus here's how you can bring your life back into full color:

    1. Leave the Herd. The life that will bring you huge meaning and fulfillment most likely doesn't look like the life your buddies or family members or neighbors are leading. Find out: what really brings you joy? What matters most to you? What are your loves and longings? They will be unique. They won't necessarily be popular. But there's no substitute for living a life full of them.

    2. Answer the Call. We all get assignments in life, callings about the work we are meant to do, the small or large ways we are meant to heal the brokenness in the world. B+ happens when we don't honor and respect those callings. Take your callings seriously. Give them time and energy. They point you toward work (work that can happen through your job or outside of it) that will bring you inexpressible fulfillment.

    3. Reclaim Your Long Lost Joys. In leaving my B+ life, I came to terms with the fact that the things I really loved when I was five were, for the most part, the things that make me happy as an adult. It's almost laughably simple. Then we make it complicated. Those things you loved years ago matter. Reclaim them.

    4. Lean Into the Questions: The process of leaving B+ brings up uncomfortable questions. Is your marriage working? Is your lifestyle aligned with who you really are? Do you need to move, change careers? How will you set those new not-so-welcome boundaries with the people you care about? As much as you can, see these difficult questions as sources of meaning in themselves--rather than as obstacles to get over so you can get on with the living. Grappling with these questions, finding your own answers to them, and gathering the courage to act on those answers is part of the journey of a rich life- it's not a step on the way to it.

    5. Let Fear Be Your Companion: Doing all of this - leaning into the questions, reclaiming long lost joys, leaving the herd and answering your callings - will evoke fear. In fact it will feel like lighting a fear bonfire underneath your little booty.

    The truth is, there is no going after an exciting, vivid, life without doing lots of things that scare the heck out of us.

    I've come to think of it like this: I'm driving along the road of my life, and fear is the annoying guy leaning out of the minivan in the lane next to me, every step of the way. He's not in my car, and he's not in my way. He's just there, my distracting traveling companion.

    Leaving B+ requires developing fear callouses, an accustomed-ness to fear. You can get in the habit of feeling afraid every day and still making the phone call, telling the difficult truth, taking the risk. Yes, your little ego will bopped around all the time as things work out well or not. You will recover. You will learn to lovingly help yourself recover too.

    Leave the herd. Answer the call. Reclaim long lost joys. Lean into the questions, and let fear be your traveling companion.

    There really is something on the other side of the B+ life. It's beautiful, and much more fun. It is waiting for you.

    source




    Sunday, August 29, 2010, 8/29/2010 02:04:00 PM




    Sunday, August 22, 2010, 8/22/2010 01:07:00 AM

    this we know:

    "Often, we repeat our same mistakes, banging our heads against the same old addictions and compulsions, generating the same old miserable and often catastrophic consequences, until we can finally stop and fix it."

    this i am:

    "I’m sarcastic, and have a smart-ass attitude. It’s a natural defense against drama, bullshit, and stupidity."

    this i will say:

    "If your ex comes back to you, after all the stupidity he did, just hug him and whisper ”Sorry, I don’t recycle rubbish.”"

    this is for the singles and the lovers:

    "When we’re incomplete, we’re always searching for somebody to complete us. When, after a few years or a few months of a relationship, we find that we’re still unfulfilled, we blame our partners and take up with somebody more promising. This can go on and on—series polygamy—until we admit that while a partner can add sweet dimensions to our lives, we, each of us, are responsible for our own fulfillment. Nobody else can provide it for us, and to believe otherwise is to delude ourselves dangerously and to program for eventual failure every relationship we enter."

    this i love, movie style:

    OMG INCEPTION IS SO FUCKING GOOD. I WANT TO MARRY LEONARDO DICAPRIO AND JOSEPH GORDON LEVITT. AT THE SAME TIME.


    and this, i believe:

    "People want to be liked. We all crave attention and affection and we all reject shame. When we get embarrassed we send a thug version of ourselves to the forefront to do our fighting for us. We’re at the top of the food chain just under fear. We don’t want to be in a relationship to hear the words “I love you,” we want to be in a relationship to say the words “I love you.” We want to feel needed, and exceptional and we hate feeling insignificant. We want to ace a hearing test. We are binary creatures; if we’re the plaintiff, we want to win every dollar. If we’re the defendant, we want guard every penny. We want to make more money than last year. We don’t want to get cancer or die in our cars and we want the same for our loved ones. We go out on weekends to try and have sex while trying not to get punched in the face. We drink so we can be ourselves and not mind it so much. We’re desperate to be understood. We want to know someone else has felt it, too. We hate being judged unfairly. We want to make the person we heard wasn’t all that into us change their minds and admit they had us wrong. We want sunny skies with a chance of killer tornadoes, just to keep music sounding good. We take hours upon hours to admit to self consciousness. We don’t know exactly how to pleasure each other. We just want love. In any and every form."




    Sunday, August 15, 2010, 8/15/2010 11:33:00 PM

    won't it be nice if you tell people that you stay at the FISH HOUSE!

    sentosa cove and 5 maids FTW.










    Monday, August 09, 2010, 8/09/2010 01:44:00 AM

    How Awesome We Were


    My best friend is in the most disgusting, dysfunctional relationship, and I hate her for it. Not because I’m worried about her, but because it makes me remember how awesome we were.

    source

    and to my friends, you must know this mantra:

    JUST BECAUSE I'M BUSY DOESN'T MEAN I DON'T LOVE YOU.

    really.