"trust is like a mirror, you can fix it if it's broken, but you can still see the crack in that mother-fucker's reflection."
you can let the sun in

Six billion of us walking the planet.
Six billion smaller worlds on the bigger one.
Shoe salesmen and short-order cooks who look boring from the outside
- some have weirder lives than you.
Six billion stories, every one an epic,
full of tragedy and triumph,
good and evil,
despair and hope.
You and me - we aren’t so special, bro.

you can say something

you can enrich your mind
Adeline
Alvin
Angeline
Cashew
Dogget
Dionnie
Faith
Ian
Janice
Jas Cheng
Jing
Kitty
Marcus A.C
Natasha
Skye
Spanky
Suzy
Yubo
ZhiQuan

you can read me again and again
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    Homeground: blogger

    Tuesday, September 30, 2003, 9/30/2003 04:35:00 PM

    I met my first puppy love yesterday on the train back home. I was talking to Serene and as the train approached Jurong East, this NS guy stood up and I looked at him and bam! A sudden tingly woozy feeling came over me. I just knew it was him. He never really changed except that he got darker, fitter and less hair. Army boy now..God, I still cant believe it was him. There was I reminiscing about it in the afternoon and tada.

    Time flies doesnt it? I havent really saw him since way back. I think he did recognise me too. He kept turning back. Man, the eye contact we had was just surprise and shock. Exact feelings I couldnt describe. Seeing a crush is one thing but see your ex was like wow.. He's already in the Army.. and he was alone.

    Isnt it funny too on how seeing someone can trigger something that you have already buried? No, I am not falling for him again.

    I learnt my lesson.




    Sunday, September 28, 2003, 9/28/2003 03:54:00 PM

    Saddam Hussein
    Circle I Limbo

    Hipsters
    Circle II Whirling in a Dark & Stormy Wind

    Bitches
    Circle III Mud, Rain, Cold, Hail & Snow

    Parents who bring squalling brats to R-rated movies
    Circle IV Rolling Weights

    General asshats
    Circle V Stuck in Mud, Mangled

    River Styx

    Qusay Hussein
    Circle VI Buried for Eternity

    River Phlegyas

    Uday Hussein
    Circle VII Burning Sands

    Osama bin Laden
    Circle IIX Immersed in Excrement

    BOB
    Circle IX Frozen in Ice

    Design your own hell




    9/28/2003 03:19:00 PM

    Went to the Jurong East Complex gym in the morning. Row to lose 50cals. Used the StairMaster to lose 117 cals and 20 mins!! Man thats tough. Did 20 crunches on the abs machine. Cycled for 10 mins. Glided for 5 mins. Toned up my thighs too. Stuff all for about an hour.

    Waiting for Serene's call to go her house.

    Hope things are cool btwn me and Indra




    Saturday, September 27, 2003, 9/27/2003 11:59:00 PM

    The thought of it still makes me mad. Really mad.

    Earlier on THURSDAy 25/9/03.Sha and I went to meet Calvin at T21 on thurs 9am plus. We always meet him at this time. As usual, Nurul msged Sha to say she will meet us there. So came 9+, met Calvin and hey, Nurul wasnt there. So Sha called her and asked where were you. 'Oh we are eating hehe' came the reply. EATING? WHAT THE FUCK? Supposed to meet Calvin at 9 and she went to eat? With Bob, always. Come on. Its like she don even fucking respect Calvin and us. I mean if shes hungry cant she go eat earlier. So when I saw her, my face just went black. A bit fed up. Well, that was only the beginning.

    Since we cant use JBUILDER 9 at T21 so we went to T15 project lab to install and use. Java programming is tough man. Its similar to Visual Basic yet different. But I can confirm that Java Programming is one of the hardest thing that I ever learnt. No matter what, I am still going to conquer it. So we fumbled, experienced and tried it. Since it was already 12 plus, skipped techno lecture and I went for lunch.

    Before leavin, I specifically told Nurul NOT TO DO THE INTERFACE anymore because it was tough. I said wait for us to come and do together. Ok so I said must finish by that day but as always procasinating, I know we cant finish one. I just told Nurul not to touch the interface, go relax and we all do together. But NO, she refused to listen and went on doing. Eventually she broke down AGAIN and went to Bob, fucker.

    I was in the midst of my lunch and suddenly the phone call came urgently for me asking me to come quickly. My first thought 'Bob knew about the Thursday gossip ah'. I wasnt really scared just curious, hell Sha was even more nervous for me. Saw Bob and Nurul huddled over the railing outside project lab. Thought: Wah serious seh but no.

    Bob faced ME with a fucking face and said/SCREAMED:'you all can dont give Nurul stress or not, she like so much pressure than you all like not doing anything, give Nurul do the interface. what kind of group are you? WHAT KIND OF GROUP MEMBERS ARE yOU? He fucking screamed at me. ME. In public In school. If I wasnt shocked, I would have punched him. So I screamed at him back what's your problem. why does it concern you. Its my group does it concern you. Then I faced Nurul if you got problems,come to me directly. Why everything BOb? Nurul then went crying
    to the toliet. Bob then went to take his bag and left. Dont forget that he slammed the door to emphasis that he was PISSED. Ooh like I wasnt. Cheebye who does he think he is. Only a boyfriend. I seriously hope they break up. Fucker. I am so mad right now typing . Then Sha and I went to the toliet to talk to Nurul and told her the truth about everything. That Bob is a fucker, asshole, jerk, nusiance, son of a bitch, bastard,
    piece of shit all rolled into one. If anyone can tell me more, thanks.

    you know something, staying in the toilet and talking to Nurul was a complete waste of time. All about those shit Nurul said that she wasnt gonna do anything to Bob is fake. Bob just sweet talked her a little and she forgave him. Theres something called SPINE and PRIDE dammit. I mean like that. and she went back to him. Fuck lah come on even she also said even if you are right, Bob will still have the tendency to make you feel wrong. I hate this kind of person. Nurul also one kind, then don wan to
    stand up for herself. What happened to will power? SIGH I donno what to do lah. I have decided to give up on them at all. I am not going to talk to them unecessarily. Waste of my time going after Nurul and making me skip BBNT. Whatever Sha and I said just went down the drain. Waste of my saliva and time. Bloody hell.

    Bob came to us and said SORRy during BBC lecture. I didnt look at him. He was timidly Sorry Sha Sorry Jas. Fuck lah who wanna believe you? I certainly didnt. Wanna apologize then later had to add that our FyP won be finished on time. Contradicting. I promise you I will finish my FYP on time. I am gonna prove it to you man. Bob pushed my buttons way too far. I am not going to forgive and forget. Asshole

    I dont care if Nurul and Bob sees this. This is my blog. I write whatever I want. I dont give a flying fuck what they think. Wanna come scream at me again. WHATEVER. I be ready. Fuck it

    I am still pissed.




    Wednesday, September 24, 2003, 9/24/2003 12:36:00 AM

    Just finished doing my class diagram for FYP. See? Procasination. Man i am so that.

    My CSW interview on Monday went well. I got 75 for it and the teacher told me I was one of the better ones. *beams* Frankly, I spoke well, maintained eye contact and all but the whole time I was talking shit. I dont even know what the hell I was talkin about. I kept fidgetin my fingers on the table in front of Sir. Damn, I wasnt supposed to do that, I was supposed to keep my hands on my lap. He also said I mentioned things that aren quite relevant. But overall he said I have a friendly and approachable personality and articulate. I kicked Sandy ass man. Wuhoo. She got 70. She said I dressed up similar to sales people but seriously, I thought she dressed up like a secretary. Seductive kind. U know the movie SECRETARY, played by Maggie Gylennal or sth like that. Sluttish too but hey thats my view.

    Oh well spent the whole Tuesday watching TV. Caught SWEET NOVEMBER with Charlize Theron and Keanu Reeves on HBO. Sigh, it was indeed sweet acting but plot dumb. Also caught MTV BASH for Carson Daly. Man MTV's gonna have TRL in OCT yay. Why didnt FRIENDS win in the EMMYs? But I love Everybody Loves Raymond. I am just babbling. Peace out.

    Your welcome Indra. TAKE NOTE OF THE E behind jasoomin




    Monday, September 22, 2003, 9/22/2003 08:56:00 AM

    In the project lab typing away.

    My CSW interview is due in half hour time. Yikes!!!! I am cooling down here hoping the sweat will evaporate fast. I am all dressed up and it's such a fucking hot day man. I hope I do good at the interview.

    Went to Orchard yesterday. I practically window shopped and for the first time in 2 months, I didnt buy anything. *evil laughs* Big deal. Then Peiwen bought lots of stuff each below $20. Its damn cheap.

    Sandy's here. Talk to yall later.

    Wish me luck!!!




    Thursday, September 18, 2003, 9/18/2003 02:30:00 PM

    THIS WEBSITE ROCKS!!!!!

    www.insultmonger.com


    I already saved it in my links.




    Wednesday, September 17, 2003, 9/17/2003 03:29:00 PM
    sucks

    In school now.

    Took my NAPFA test yesterday. Did well for my 5 stations but 2.4km run... uh aint that good. Lets show off my results shall we?
    1st stop SITS UP in 1 min = 37 (5pts)
    2nd stop STANDING BROAD JUMP = 171cm (2pts)
    3rd stop FLEX ARM HANG = 3 (2pts) [hehehe i couldnt do it anymore. i hate that segment anyway]
    4th stop SIT AND REACH = 37cm (3 pts)
    5th stop SHUTTLE RUN = 11.87 secs (2pts)
    6th stop 2.4KM RUN = failed by 1 min
    So to sum up, i failed everything.. Sigh I was so close in getting silver and yet I was late by 1 min. Sucks leh Of course I did not practise for running. Sigh. The last time I went to gym was 2 weeks ago so its still ok.. One thing that comforted me all was that I finished all 6 rounds. Yes I did. All 6 rounds thank you everymuch. Sha and Nurul didnt finish.. they only completed 4 rounds. I think people did underestimate me because they were like 'wah u did quite well ah' Hello I have GOOD STAMINA. Its finally over. I am also grateful that I did go for the test because it tested my strength, stamina and physical fitness. Mom also forced me so yea. I think I like exercising now as I found a pair of running shoes used to be buried deep in the storeroom. Wuhoo.

    Now for the news today: got back my MSTs results
    MMSP LAB = 81
    MMSP TEST = 46 (dammit I failed.) I am so gonna study hard.
    BBC TEST = 60 (slightly better. Was kinda surprised but still pleasant)
    The rest later of the week.. I am kinda half moping around. Sandy won me all except for MMSP lab !!! Sigh. I always beat her.. I know I am competitive but only towards those who I know I can beat. Call me shallow but hey that justs me. But yall still my best buddies, right? *winks*. Sheesh even Wayne beat me in MMSP. Thats great. I know heck I told Wayne myself that kind of 'i cant believe you beat me' feeling to him. Am i making sense at all? I am listening to Michael Buble on my discman thats why a bit distracted. I hope you all understand what I am going through. I am such a sucker seriously. SIgh. To Bryan, you can do well in exams, gotta have faith, dude. We all will help.

    Ooh, Ailian won tickets to this movie called MY BOSS'S DAUGHTER. Starring Ashton Kutcher ( damn hot, he makes up top 10 hunks of my list) and Tara Reid. Its at Shaw Beach Road. Its becoming one of my fav places to watch movies. Wah if only every week watch free movie.. Dream on girl. Movie starts at 7.30pm so I am gonna head on home first.

    I always tell my mom about school this time no different BUT i will tell her I scored 50 for MMSP test instead 46. White lie, harmless. This terms MSTs were damn hard. Seriously, all of yall DICT students say YEA. See? Dammit I did study for it man. I even taught Wayne all MMSP and he passed which is really good for him. I am happy for him, really. Disciple takes over the teacher. My thighs and arms are aching. My bad.

    Tell yall about the movie. 99% watchin for Ashton Kutcher. UH huh.




    Sunday, September 14, 2003, 9/14/2003 01:40:00 AM
    True

    HASH(0x873495c)
    Protector


    The ULTIMATE personality test
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    Saturday, September 13, 2003, 9/13/2003 11:54:00 PM
    wow

    Today was my dads birthday, so happy bdae Dad!! *burst out WUHOOING* Went to The Gapz at Pacific Plaza for dinner. The Gapz is a dim sum cum noodles bar. It follows the concept of conveyor belt sushi so as u guessed it, conveyor belt dim sum. Pretty cosy place but a little small. Most of the customers were mostly 20s to 30s so my parents were like above the average. heh. Still, AWESOME DINNER. Then we hopped over to Shaw Isetan for a walk then later to THAT CD SHOP to look at cds. That shop freaking rocks man! Its interior deisgn is so contemporary and so zen and so cool. Its so suited for chilling out. That cd shop adds on to my -cool place to work at- list. Bought a MOFFATTS cd for $6.90!!!!! So freaking cheap man!!!! Its the 2nd album SUMODALITIES. I am a fan of the MOFFATTS ever since the start and will always be. But donno where are they now. oh well. Btw I love Michael Buble and Hayley Westenra.

    Much as I love my dad but he pissed me off a little. I know its his day but hey its still isnt right. I was walking in front of him and suddenly he said 'your butt looks big'. I was like what the hell? So i said Dad. do u have a problem? He laughed and said it was an eye sore. Also, I take pride in my complexion and my dad would say 'your face a little rough leh' I was dad, if u could give me money to do a facial that would be nice. He laughed and said hahah go use sandpaper to roughen it out. Anyway my complexion is good. DAMMIT. I wasnt pissed, just bemused why my dad would say that. I am his daughter, not HEIDI KLUM. god. Lets face it, my dad is a male chauvinist pig and a sexist. aM I PROUD. *rolls eyes*. Anyway happy bdae Dad.

    Went to work for 4 hours on Friday. Same job as my itp which was sales. $5/hr and 5% comission if i managed to sell 15 sets. My boss allowed me to get a partner which at first I tot was easy job. NO, it wasnt. I called Peiwen, Tian Hua and Serene who all have school. sigh. Then I called Bryan my classmate who he tot was on Sunday so nah. Then I called Hari, Wayne, ZJ and Nurul. All cant. Double Sigh. Funny thing was everybody told me to call Aisha. I was like no, I can bet my life on it that she wont work. I understand her. Sheesh. In the end, I called Ailian. She was my last choice at 12.30am. Luckily she agreed and I am very thankful for that. Take a hint all my GOOD FRIENDs. Then when we met at 7am at JE, we both were like wah lau damn tired then grumbled. We are all like that. The counter was at a WET MARKET. Wow first time leh... Somemore in front of a fish stall. Wuhoo no wonder that day everything smelt fishy. Only sold 3 sets of can opener. Aint easy cuz wet market people were not open to the idea of havin a free gift counter whereas supermarket were. So we were like auntie, take a look lah.. cheap cheap leh.. Still nobody really came and looked. Anyway we got our 20 bucks for 4 hours and practically did nothing, it was worth it. Forgot to mention that the market was at Bedok, opposite TP. Then I went back to school for my weekly FyP meeting. Lets just say that FyP is gonna be gruelling. Gonna stay back in school more later and often. Sigh.

    New sch term starting on Monday. Damn fast and soon I will know my MST results. Huh.. I dont feel like getting it back becuz i know i wldnt do well.. But its ok becuz I will learn from this and kick ass in the exams. Just watch.

    U wldnt believe it and I wldt. I won a Perfect 10 preview of the movie CAMP. Its on 16 step 7pm at Orchard Cineleisure. I myself was surprised also. Really. Wah lau... But I didnt win the Meet Kelly Clarkson showcase at Embassy. Sigh.. I dont think I can make it to the movie, got NAPFA test.. I havent exercised in 2 weeks.

    Think I am gonna run tomorrow. Hope I keep to that.





    Wednesday, September 10, 2003, 9/10/2003 10:44:00 AM
    Shit

    In school.

    Today was the last day of our MSTs. So far everything sucks, dammit i did study. Today's paper wasnt satisfying because deep down inside, I know I couldnt score. Yes, I am so kiasu. *whines* I feel so miserable. Sigh. Its aint over till its over.

    I wouldnt recommend yall to watch Jeepers Creepers 2. Horrible teen flick with this monster who looked like Freddy Krueger except that its face is black who went around eating humans every 23 years 23 days. Well if u went to watch sequel 1 nah still better don go watch. Uh some parts were funny like sick humour. Oh well.

    I called into Perfect 10 Jive Drive yesterday and won tickets to the Black Eyed Peas cd launch Party at Future on 19 Sept. I was esctatic and heard my voice on the radio for the first time. Man shameless am I, i think my voice sounded young. Way young. Damn.. 5 secs of fame. I think Vernon A is damn cool. :) I donno whether i should go or not, not because its late but I dont have a transport home. Like a CAR. hint hint. Depends.

    I seriously hope to pass for all my tests. I am going to study hard.




    Monday, September 08, 2003, 9/08/2003 03:31:00 PM
    Shit

    Spent the rest of the week studying BBC. Memorising studying. Its finally over today and it sucks.

    Qns that I thought werent supposed to be in mCQ came out in short qns form. Thats just dandy. I answered all the qns but I couldnt answer some in full. I just dont understand. And dammit I forgot how to calculate the AAL5 layers. *wails* One qn cost 16 marks. Sigh. I hope my MCQ can help me. I wish to pass. Hopes of scoring * poof*
    I learnt a lesson: NEVER ASSUME CAUSE IT MAKES AN ASS OUT OF ME AND ME ALONE.
    One comfortin thought: I think my bbc lab test scored a 100. *fingers crossed*

    Ooh!!! i won tickets to watch Jeepers Creepers 2!!!! WUHOO!!!!! The show starts tonight 7.30pm and its at Shaw Beach Road. I am going with Ailian. U knoe what, Serene my best bud won too!!!!! ahahaha went to her house and entered for her too. Hey we both won together!!! This way we get to go together hehehe. Shes gonna bring Miaoling... our pri sch friend. I didnt really like her in pri sch. Okok Fine I was a petty childish immature horrible brat at 12.Some circumstances resulted me in that. But who isnt at 12? Surprised was my reaction. I promise to put on my best behaviour.

    Thank goodness tml papers BBNT is an open book test. TOday bbc is a shitter and lets hope tml is a breeze. Peace out.




    Thursday, September 04, 2003, 9/04/2003 11:50:00 AM
    Tagging

    Had an interesting day yesterday.

    But it all started not so cheerful in the morning. Supposed to meet the guys (Ian, Indra and wayne) at 11.45am. Then at 9 plus, Ian msged me saying that they will be late and wayne already went shopping. First thought. HUH? EARLy IN THE MORNING WENT SHOPPING? Fine. Then later msged again saying meet at 12.10pm. Wah its like getting later and later. I was irritated because they couldnt set a definite time. Hmph. Like no time management. Guys.

    So I went to meet them in school. I was hot and irritated and pmsing. As usual, they knew I WOULD BE PISSED so they gave me a reason asap. Wayne was like see? I knew she would be pissed. I was. But then, they were like nono, then blah blah blah all the reasons.. fine. Indra kept what lah u. grumbled and grumbled on only. I am a female. I am entitled to do that.

    So we studied for a while. I didnt really study. I just went there to answer Waynes doubts. I cannot study outside for my home is my inspiration. Hah lame. At about 1.45pm, we went to project lab and surfed. The guys addicted to quizilla.com. hahahahaha. Uh I just think its funny. So we left for this delicious mutton chop at clementi.

    Indra ordered 5 bucks worth and Wayne 4 bucks. Wah 5 bucks of mutton chop was damn worth it. 3 eggs, more fries and more chops and bigger plate too. Ian ate chicken chop. I didnt eat anything because I wasnt hungry and I was eating something later so nah.. so they joked and ate and ate. Btw guys I think Brad Pitt looked more hot in INTERVIEW WITH AN VAMPIRE. Indra kept saying I was noisy because I kept grumbling. Hello, hot and pmsing. Forgive and shut up.

    So after the lunch, went Serene Center to look at comics. On the bus journey, everyone kept quiet but its a comfortable quiet. We ended up taking 74 because 154 took damn long. We had to walk a long way because Wayne being the 'kind' soul, took the initiative and alighted way before the designated stop.So I was like huh. Then they keep encouraging me like hurry, only one more road to cross. It was far, seriously.

    So we reached (finally), then we went to check out manly toys. Like those action figurines, Hey, its a guy thing. Went to check out comics. Comics mart sold Archie comics much cheaper than others but I didnt buy, Short of $$. We all didnt buy anything. Went to Mac to eat something. I ordered Lemon Lime and I shared my drink with Ian. I offered to Wayne then he don wan. Then later, he wanted. So stubborn. Like kid only. Indra was listening to Metallica. Eww I hate metallica. Funny ah Indra, simple plan and neh neh neh. Inside joke.

    Then we left and I went to meet Ailian at Jurong East pasar malam. Just hanged out and later headed for home. Watched Charmed (fav show of all) and later, High School Reunion. The latter was a reality show and man I think I am hooked on it. Natasha the popular girl is such a bitch. I thought Maya was sweet to go on a hall pass with Ben then later when she organized the private party with Natasha and Patricia, she sucked. I like Dave and Holly. I think Holly is beautiful and Ben is so cute!!!

    TODAy:
    I think the guys are on their way or already reached Jurong East Sports Complex. They are meeting to go swimming today. I didnt join them for I was afraid the water might turn red. They are like so near me yet so far. Heh. Then they also talked about wearing trunks, shorts or tighties. What the hell is tighties?

    Oh well I hope they have fun. I had fun hanging out with them. Love u guys.




    Tuesday, September 02, 2003, 9/02/2003 04:11:00 PM

    Leo
    You should be dating a Leo.
    23 July - 22 August
    This mate is honest and loyal, with a sunny
    disposition. Though this lion has the tendency
    to be arrogant, sulky or smug, he/she is
    unrestrained in bed.


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