"trust is like a mirror, you can fix it if it's broken, but you can still see the crack in that mother-fucker's reflection."
you can let the sun in
Six billion smaller worlds on the bigger one.
Shoe salesmen and short-order cooks who look boring from the outside
- some have weirder lives than you.
Six billion stories, every one an epic,
full of tragedy and triumph,
good and evil,
despair and hope.
You and me - we aren’t so special, bro.
you can say something
you can enrich your mind
Adeline
Alvin
Angeline
Cashew
Dogget
Dionnie
Faith
Ian
Janice
Jas Cheng
Jing
Kitty
Marcus A.C
Natasha
Skye
Spanky
Suzy
Yubo
ZhiQuan
Alvin
Angeline
Cashew
Dogget
Dionnie
Faith
Ian
Janice
Jas Cheng
Jing
Kitty
Marcus A.C
Natasha
Skye
Spanky
Suzy
Yubo
ZhiQuan
you can read me again and again
you can thank them
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Saturday, February 24, 2007, 2/24/2007 12:57:00 AM
i'm sick and tired of taking initiative all the time.Sunday, February 18, 2007, 2/18/2007 01:58:00 AM
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Wednesday, February 14, 2007, 2/14/2007 12:25:00 AM
work's a bitch.i am the one of the highest paid junior staff and the lowest paid too. why? because i am the only junior staff. dont bother to include interns. i didn't get my cpf during my 3 months probation period which they cheated me up to $1k. when asked to confirm cpf for my confirmation, i was told jokingly "aiyah, why u so hurry to get cpf? u getting married soon issit?" cheebye. $1k not money issit.
do u know my finance manager is like inseparable with my boss? thus i need to suck up to both in order my life to work. i don't know whether i have "bite me" on my forehead cus sometimes she(the finance) will come bite me on my arm. there will be prominent teeth marks and you have no idea how much it fucking hurts. bitch please.
my boss told me to prioritize my work. FUCK THAT. i don't prioritize? each time i do something, i am told to do this, do that. follow up here, follow up there. i have a such a scattered job scope and everybody seems to master the art of tai chi. and my finance (read: my boss kaki) blew up this issue where i haven't been chasing my client for payment. OH SHUCKS, why don't they include "chase payment" in my job scope earlier, i could so prep myself up for few pig heads, u know. so thus my boss came breathing down my neck (oh, u got problems issit, need to flag girl need to). cheebye. u come around keep asking me to do this, follow up this, book this in.
they can so lick my crack.
i need to do cold calls to spruce up sales,i need to do schedules for my artistes, i need to cast my artistes/talents, i need to coordinate auditions, i need to edit video clips for showreel purposes. and some artistes are such pain in the asses (no i demand this, no i demand that, my career is in your hands, you say u'll try, ur new?) fuck themmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. no gratitude, no appreciation. and i need to prioritize?!!!!!!!!!!!!
god, i'm too nice. i'm transitioning into my 5th to 6th month and people already know i'm this nice and oh so easy to push over. i need to change, i need to stop being a doormat, i need to stop being accomodating.
but i will continue to let my colleagues think i'm this whole fun loving ditz.
fuck them bitchesssssss.
please do save your judgement for yourself.
work's a zoo, the hardcore bathe the lions and feed the polar bears. i'm just merely in charge of the admission fees and do semi publicity.
Sunday, February 11, 2007, 2/11/2007 03:50:00 AM
my mom once got pissy at me cus i greeted her with "hello!". you see, i just said hello, i didn't go hello mom. guess it's an unconcious habit of going hello to everybody and she wants to be special like she's my mom?! oh well.hello. i apologize if i do sound incoherent because it's 4 plus now i guess i better write something before time sucks me high and dry.
work's been really x infinity crazy and busy. if i were to list down my job scope, it will be never-ending and i do realize that i'm a hard worker, not a smart worker. which is pretty pathetic cus i tend to want to do everything and also,i think people will not be able to do a good job like me. chey, self praise. i don't know, i don't really delegate cus i think if i can do it, why not. besides it'll be neater and organized. chey self praise. the major downpoint is that my job efficiency will be greatly reduced. i'll try la still. chey self praise.
god, i'm so tired. everybody knows and everybody hurts.
21 days(including weekends) of continuous work, i'm tryin to beat the record of 30 days. i am not paid enough, i don't know whether they'll be appreciative, i hardly see my friends, i hardly see my parents, i hardly have dates, much less my life. YOU THINK I CAN GO ON CONTINUOUSLY FOR 30 DAYS issit?!!! OMFG. NO.
i'm goin down.
fundamentally happy marked the 1st play of 2007 for me and it was one that i was dying to catch last year which i didnt. fortunately it had 2 days of re-run for m1 fringe festival 2007 and i just had to catch it, which i did. it was worth my every single $30 and we insisted on sitting the 1st row cus value for money mah. i tell you the play was very thought provoking and you actually have to think and piece the story together. the whole cast consisted of this malay actress and enlai and i tot enlai was damn good.
i just have to tell you the short synopsis which revolves around paedophilia. eric (played by enlai)is this medical social worker who came back from australia to his fav neighbour habiba(played by malay actress) house. eric came back to look for his predator (habiba's husband) whom he developed feelings for when he was 10. actually i dont know how u developed feelings for a cocksucker who put his cock into a 10 year boy's mouth and order him to suck. pun pun. anyway, let's look deep. it's about the emotions, the feelings, the affection that comes with it. like eric felt wanted which i can so totally relate (think jason part but of course minus the sex). to stop looking desperate, eric put up a false front by pressing charges but then withdrew back again cus he was selective on what he chose to remember. of course habiba don't believe la then kicked up fuss but in the end she also admitted that her husband is indeed a paedophile. so it's about loneliness and desire all channelled in the wrong directions.
so is paedophilia going to be accepted in some perspectives after all? not in mine i say, cus i still think all paedophiles should be castrated and then die.
god, i'm exhausted.
i went to this tarot card reader and i thought i would share her readings:
1) 2007 is going to be quite a stable year but it's gonna be frustating and busy.
2) she knows i am a newbie. she reckons i have a lot to learn and i need to learn fast to order to climb the rope.
3) the 1st 6 months are going to be very busy for you.
4) i'm bit of a perfectionist and i'm pretty hard on myself when things go wrong. so it's important to make mistakes, learn and let go.
5) it's gonna be rewarding for me in long term but will be filled with frustations.
6) i had a possible romance but it failed and u were disappointed with it.
7) i will have nothing for the next 6 mths.
8) i may meet someone new come jun/jul.
9) in the romance sector, i come across as unapproachable towards guys and should take the initiative.
10) i should probably meet someone good when i'm 28 and can settle down.
all i could say was OMFG. ARE YOU KIDDING, IT'S SO FREAKINGLY TRUE (work, jason and my souless life). so if i come on too strongly on some people or if i start smiling for no fuck reason. do remember this reading, i need to take the intiative for i come across as unapproachable (read: fucked up face). and 5 years before marriage, i can sleep around as much as i want. woohoo. for a more detailed read, i can always pay $70 for an hour.
i could spend an entire day in sheng siong market and not get bored. besides there's this cute guy who helps to cut fish for aunties at the tekka mall branch. and i spent a good 10 mins helping the crabs to turn upright in the crate.
so i have attended my first concert (muse) and my first play (fundamentally happy). all i need to complete my small life is to watch my first movie of 2007, does anybody want to watch notes on a scandal?
news have reported that singapore is gonna reach a population of 6.5 million in 20 years time. the govt says no problem and we will have ample resources to do that. SURE, WHY DONT WE CUT DOWN ALL TREES AND RECLAIM ALL THE LAND, LEAVIN NO SEA/RIVER. AND GET MORE PEOPLE IN. YES WHY NOT. do u think in 20 years time, i'll be 43, i'll be more welcoming and less bitchy?
its 4.55am and i got to work for my room tomorrow, i can't wait.
now please excuse me while i go to my bed and make endless body contact with it.
"there are some people so addicted to exaggeration that they can't tell the truth without lying"
Monday, February 05, 2007, 2/05/2007 10:19:00 PM
hello, i have sold my soul to the company.